Shift, shifting, shifted.

Shift - Shifting - ShiftED. These are the three words that have been surfacing over and over the past few weeks. There is definitely a shift occurring for me - a number of shifts actually, both inner soul shifts and 'outer' shifts. For the past year I have felt myself inwardly preparing, discovering and acquiring the armour needed to stand more firmly and to move forward bravely and confidently. I always imagine a gypsy-Indian-warrior-girl, adorning herself in her fine feather-headdress and stepping into her boots ready to face the world. I think of her and it's as though I can feel myself connect with her inner strength. Initially I thought I was preparing to face whatever I came up against in the 'world'....and now I realise that it's actually all the things that come up internally, all the inner 'battles' of the ego that I need to be ready for. It is these battles that can be the most disarming - it is the ego that tells me that I need to have the approval of others, that I need to be 'more talented', that reacts to uncomfortable situations, that engages in negativity, that makes me question and doubt the path that is magically manifesting when I allow my Intuition (Truth) to lead the way. It is so interesting to become an observer of these stories for a little while, to see how they unfold and impact me - it becomes such a soul-battle and it can become so confusing as to which story holds Truth. This is the shift I am experiencing though, as I'm becoming more aware of how to identify these stories when they come up and how to release them with affirmations of Truth, with acceptance (rather than resistance) and gentleness. At the heart of all this is the awareness that everything is connected and in knowing that 'who I am' - my 'identity' - is not defined by whatever stories I've created (or that anybody else has created for that matter).

Another shift has been the decision to move back into my studio at home! It seemed like such a difficult decision to make and I resisted the idea initially. What will that look like to other people? Won't it seem like I didn't 'succeed'? What if I'm meant to stay there to learn some lesson I just haven't worked out yet? Anyway, putting these questions aside (gently!)...it just comes down to the fact that it feels like the 'right action' for now! I can't believe that five months have passed since I moved in there! I have learnt so much from being there - totally confronted the fear of feeling exposed in that way and realised it wasn't really all that painful (ah-hm...I'll try remember that next time). I was also able to learn more about the art world in general and begin to find confidence in becoming part of that. Here, now, is a new phase...a new chance to allow myself to shift and continue along the path of finding my True creative voice.

I can feel the shift there too...feel myself tuning into my own well of inspiration more and more. Part of this is learning to accept strengths that I do have rather than looking for my weaknesses all the time. I know I'm not alone in finding it hard to do this and to put aside the 'perfectionist' that likes to emerge. I have been constantly reminding myself to accept the "imperfect" and to go with the flow...Allow Ease. Isn't it interesting how we can often start beating ourselves up over all of these things - for not being easeful, for example - even though by beating ourselves up it is contradictory to the whole point of everything! (and here the notion of 'doing your best' comes to mind - your best in this moment cannot become a comparison)

SO! Here is the lesson then - to be gentle and kind toward the Self even when in the process of shifting. Have awareness, notice and allow the discomfort of those shifts...do your best in this moment but! ALSO be gentle on yourself because the ego never does like to be challenged or shifted out of the way. So you can count on a challenge - but you can also know that you have already totally conquered it...your inner strength, intuition, wise soul knows exactly what it's doing all along! Trust that voice and just wait to see what starts manifesting along your path.

"When you follow your bliss...doors will open where you would not have thought there would be doors, and where there wouldn't be a door for anyone else" 
- Joseph Campbell

And just one more little reminder for all of us - a note from a lovely friend of mine that sits on my new studio desk as a constant reminder:

Nothing without joy.

Here is to You: May you allow yourself to shift with gentleness, ease and joy...ever closer to the Truth of who You already ARE.

peace. love. joy. gratitude

xxx